service learning was good. (:
i wanted t blog about it ytd night but i only managed t survive reading 2 out of 12 sets of bio notes for tdy's bio test.
before i gave in to fatigue and went t sleep. HAHA
and before that i fell asleep like 3465890365820954238 times and left alot of stupid dots on my paper cause i fell asleep while holding onto my uncapped highlighter. ):
what a long sentence ahahas.

ANYWAY. that wasn't what i wanted t blog about.
haha service learning! (:
actl maybe the fact that our original plan fell though was a blessing in disguise?
went t assisi home&hospice instead and i swear it was damn meaningful.

we cleaned wheelchairs (and sat on them -_-) then i wheeled one up back into the ward.
then there was this man, probably in his sixties sitting on the bed.
at first he stared at me when i wheeled the wheelchair in.
then i smiled at him and he waved at me!
he smiled, but there was just something that.. i dont know how t describe that feeling.
then i felt damn sad ):
aye......

had lunch at the cafe in the hospital. then we performed a few songs for them. then they had some ktv session and we sang along and interacted with them.
kahhwee speaks good hokkien. :O

went back t school aft that for trng.
beep test. D: ahaha but i managed past level 6 which was my original target.
NOT BAD LA. (:

okay sidetrack abit.
came across this phrase tdy.
"a woman closes up when a man dumps his anger on her."
and then i was thinking. and i guess it was kinda true.

mmm okay its late and i need t start on vectors soon.
YES im determined t get my vectors right. -CLENCHES FIST.-

goodnight people!
(and im in dire need of more moolahs.)
hahahahahahahaha okay inside joke. xD

BYE.

feel like i cant talk t you anymore.

its a wonder how some people can never learn tact.

oh in other news, its been a wasted sunday yet again but whatever la, i cant be bothered already.
so many things t do suddenly, but i havent found the mood t study yet.
and the more i think about all the things that are lining up for me,
sometimes i wonder if i did the right thing saying that i want t go for mr500.
then its piano exam, and i havent booked the studio for practice.
im totally not prepared and now i can only sit and watch the time go by.
and wonder whether or not t go for the exam since i guess i wld fail anyway.

to sum it up bascially, I AM STRESSED. ):
very very very stressed that i guess im starting t lose my patience and temper quite easily.
so, im sorry if i never get pissed and start screaming at people.
probably i need t vent and i really dont mean t do so.

im hooked onto this song.

Boys Like Girls - Dance Hall Drug
"Grown up" she just turned 16
Stuck in the moment
Dead at the scene
And it's on tonight
This is the life that you wanted right?
So turn off all the lights
Dressed up just like a movie star
At all the parties, they'll know who you are
Wouldn't it be great
To be fashionably late?
So why don't you wait 'til you're sedated

Don't it feel like something's not right in his kiss tonight?

All I'm saying is do you, do you want to lose it all?
'Cause this is more than just a dance hall drug
You can't wait to fall in love
All I'm saying is do you, do you want to learn to fly?
Then you should pack it up and say goodbye
'Cause when the push comes to the shove,
He's just a dance hall drug

Step in and you can lock the door
The candles are lit and the clothes on the floor
You could take a chance on finding romance
Now you're holdng hands
But he's got other plans
Tick-tock, the clock is turning red
The room won't stop spinning and thoughts in your head
And it's too late
You feel like you're making a big mistake
You should've waited

Don't it feel like something's not right in his kiss tonight?

All I'm saying is do you, do you want to lose it all?
'Cause this is more than just a dance hall drug
You can't wait to fall in love
All I'm saying is do you, do you want to learn to fly?
Then you should pack it up and say goodbye
'Cause when the push comes to the shove,
He's just a dance hall drug

Just wait, love
Show 'em what you're made of

Don't it feel like something's not right in his kiss tonight?

Do you, do you want to lose it all?
'Cause this is more than just a dance hall drug
You can't wait to fall in love
All I'm saying is do you, do you want to learn to fly?
Then you should pack it up and say goodbye
'Cause when the push comes to the shove,
He's just a dance hall drug
Do you, do you want to lose it all?
'Cause this is more than just a dance hall drug
You can't wait to fall in love
All I'm saying is do you, do you want to learn to fly?
Then you should pack it up and say goodbye
'Cause when the push comes to the shove,
He's just a dance hall drug

alrights i'll try t go do some studying.
beats staying arnd here worrying about everything but not doing anything t salvage the situation right.

okay, laters.

you always get me up just t make me fall even harder;
TIRED. i really am.
but theres nothing i can do so WHATEVER MANN.
damnit. i dont care i dont care i dont care i dont care i dont care.
yes i know i dont care.

and i became some angsty shit all over again.
no I DONT CARE, remember?


ANYWAYS. ytd was time trials plus trng aft that.
did 2 500metres rundown back to back
(and the second one was totally unprepared for, physically and mentally.)
i swear i almost died.

line up was rather screwed as usual.
but its getting better, i hope.

then it was another 10 and coach changed my paddle.
first few was good. then i got so tired that i dint know what i was doing anymore.
and then i started shivering non-stop after we kept the boats.
whhee said its hypo. GASP :O

drank powergel HAHAS. and i realised im no longer scared of the taste anymore!
last time when we just started using powergel i always had t take it with water cause i cldnt stand the taste. and the viscosity (did i spell it correctly?) for that matter.
BUT I DINT DRINK WATER YTD!
and it felt okay hahahas. YAY.

then it was dinner with the usual few at subway.
and we talked till almost 8plus, almost 9.
late, but it was fun all the same.
haha cause we're random people.

alrights imma go now.
and whhee still havent replied me.
GAHH.

stairs trng, my calfs are dying.
my quads are dying too, but my calfs are dying more.
HAHAHA i dont make sense.

stupid things always happen.
i ran till i fell down today.
IN THE MIDDLE OF SOME RANDOM HBD ESTATE.
it was embarrassing.
but more importantly, IT WAS PAINFUL.
very very very painful. ):

and t think i was still telling whhee that i can feel a cramp in my calfs and the next thing i knew, the cramp in my right calf suddenly uhm. exploded? and evolved into some shitass painful shit.
it was really shit. D:
and i just fell like that cause i cldnt move my calf anymore.

haha mrQ stretched for it for me but it was hell man.
pain like hell. DDDD:

then we still had t run back t school. and run another 6 rounds arnd the track.
thank god we jogged. or i think my calf wld start cramping again haha.
and after much analysing with eugene, we decided that it was the climbing DOWN of the steps that made my calf cramp!
so moral of the story: take lift down next time HAHA.

i hope it'll recover before beep/bleep test.

anyway, there was 2.4 trial napfa today and i wasnt feeling very well.
hence i kinda like half ran half jogged.
gahhh. i shld be ashamed of myself. ):
the girls are improving way way way more than i am.
no wait, im deproving. ))):
i know its stupid, but i feel stressed.
oh dear.

i cant rmb what happened during the week.
i think i've got short term memory hahaha.

in other news,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY CEYONG AND JACK!
the team loves you(s)! (:

oh how cld i forget.
asics guy came on tues WITH MY NICE GREEEN DS TRAINERS (12)!
but the size was too small and i dont think they have any sizes left for ds 12 and so im probably going t get the ugly ORANGE ds trainer (13).
orange is a nice colour, but the green one is ten times nicer.
okay maybe more than ten times nicer. BOOO ):

wed was water trng and we did so many run-downs that i swear my bicep swelled up so much that it was attempting t burst.
CAN SEE THE VEINS POPPING UP SOMEMORE.
it was still fun anyway. the first few sets at least.
but when will i ever get t paddle k2!!!!!

haha i shld REALLY be going and do work.
but i feel tired and lazy and sleepy.
so im going to sleep (:
sleep is good hahahaa.
GOODNIGHT!

and i bet i'll be aching like crap tmr. GAHHHH.

it'd be nice to live in a world without pain and hurt.
i want t be like barney. (and that was random.)

i figured that its not good t trust so easily.
cause it made me feel like i was the biggest fool in the whole wide world.

in other news, chem SPA's tmr and i totally forgot all about it.
until whhee msged me about the impt points we needed t know.
THEN I RMBERED I HAD SPA TMR.
spa is spas(tic). haha

goodnight people.

i think i just saw something that i shldnt have.
and here i am wondering what the fuck have i just done.

im sorry for that but i hope you'll understand where im coming from.
i feel like disappearing from the face of this earth forever and ever and no one will ever find me again.

fuck.

i realised i've been mia for quite some time.
friendship week is quite successful la. (:

monday was 'make a new friend' day.
everyone was given a sticker with a face on it and we're supposed t find people with the same face and colour and say hi!
hahah my school people quite cute ah.

tuesday was 'surprise a friend' day
student councilors gave each class a cake and then the whole day was spent TRYING t "surprise" people.
it was qutie retarded though HAHAHA.

wednesday was confession day.
they set up the goalpost in front of the cafe, at the fitness corner there and people are supposed t pin their confessions up.
it was qutie entertaining, like the one "written" by guangjie.
HAHAHAHA.

then thurs was valentine's day.
and before i forget, HAPPY BELATED VALENTINE'S DAY!
BIG THANKYOU t all for the gifts!
especially the very very sweet guys from 07S11 (:


haha video frm valentine's day.

its not very clear but the first present was a super badly torn piece of paper that says:
From the very sentimental guys of 07S11,
HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!
We hope you like this CARD. We're sure our thought counts alot. You're touched, admit it (:
eugene's idea ahaha. its like so him la LOL.

yup and then the whole day was pretty good. (:
its nice t see everyone so happy and stuff, giving and recieving gifts that although may be small but means alot! cause afterall its the thought that counts what. :D
spread the love people!

aside from sweets cookies and all that, recieved 3 sunflowers and 3 roses!
i feel loved! sunflowers are damn pretty. :D

then had trng (yes, on valentine's day).
climbed alot of stairs, sprinted and did statics.
it was SUPPOSEDLY light cause it was valentine's day.
HAHAHA what the hell!
im like totally not looking forward t next thurs. D:

friday was melshan day. *COUGH* i mean bestfriend day. HAHAHA
but the highlight of the day was GP lesson.
first time we recieved papers without any hair on it! cause everytime our gp notes will have hair on them. maybe koh's got hairloss problem. HEH.
and then we were getting high drawing hair on everyone's papers. -_-
totally laughed damn loud in front of his face and i think he's quite pissed with me.
(plus i wrote the valentine's day notes during gp lesson on thurs and it was so obvious that he had t stand beside my table so i'd stop writing. HAHA)
LOOK I SPENT MUCH EFFORT WRITING THE NOTES FOR THE CANOE GUYS K.
hahahas.

oh and we made badges!
i did one for daniel and another for gracia!
(ANYWAY HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY T DANIEL AND GRACIA! :D)
and we finally made our xiaoblack, xiaobrown and xiaowhite badges. (:

asics guy came aft school t sell shoes and i bought a new pair of ds trainers.
its nice and GREEEEEEEN. (:
then went t royal hotel with the guys after that t get the balls (HAHA)
and then went back t school for the movie thing.
we were SUPPOSED t see the screen only but we ended up watching the whole movie!

fell asleep almost right aft i reached home and forgot t set the alarm clock DDDD:
thank god i woke up in time for trng tdy. haha

it was damn sunny tdy and im sunburnt.
HAHA like how rare is that. and my face is damn red ))):


and im sorry.
stop doing all this t yourself, please.
cause i aint worth it all.

the more i read/observe whatsoever, the more i think that i was right all along.
but i guess its okay, cause you deserve so much more than this.
just move on and move along, i'll do fine.

anyway, friendship week has beeen. quite entertaining.
with all the smiley stickers and random boos. (surprise! :D)
and i heard it'd be confession day tmr.
HAHAHA HELLO HAIR.

gahhh i feel so drained out and tired i fell asleep throughout econs lect tdy.
and it was such deep sleep and i actually dreamt.
to make things worse, i fell asleep on the bus home too.
and i missed my stop. D:
had t walk back despite my dying quads.
all thanks t tabata squats aft gym ytd.
i walked arnd sch like a duck tdy HAH QUACK.

okay imma go do some stuffs now and SLEEP.
nights.

i just finished my econs essay!
and i dont know what the hell am i doing here.
HAHAS.

theres school tmr and im so not looking forward to but oh well, thats life. isn't it.
just smile smile smile and i know that everything will be over. (:

i kinda like staying up late into the night when the whole house is quiet and i can concentrate, do my work and think about things without having anyone bother me at all.
the feeling's just so... serene and powerful. (:

yupp its been such a long long time.
we've been holding onto something that seems so surreal.
everything has just been like a dream.
memories? of course. but there was the fair share of bad times as well.
msn nicknames do mean a thing, when i say maybe its time i'd let go, i meant it.
im trying and i know i have to.
it'll be the best solution.
cause i know you'll probably be happier with her.

nope im not emo or what.
in fact im pretty sure of what im doing now.

till then, i'll learn t let you go.

the food! with the not very fresh pig liver :(

and thats part of the team! (minus raymond)

yupp thats all (:
it was fun! ahahas.
we shld have this more often, minus the pig liver though.
i've got phobia already heh.

alright, cyahs. :D

sometimes, i really dont understand why you cld be so nice t her but every single thing i do seem t piss you off.
not trying t imply anything, really.
i just feel that things are a little weird, thats all.

in other words, HELLO WORLD.
im not dead yet but i've been sleeping almost the whole day.
and i still feel quite dead.

i really dont like the feeling of being awake but too dead/tired t do anything.
dear Lord please help me recover soon. ):

maybe i shld go drink some glucose. hahas.

omg i feel like crap now.. ):

cldnt sleep the whole night and i just puked. like alot alot of stuffs out.
))))):

initially i wanted t blog about team steamboat last night but i guess im like half-dead already.
too dead t blog.
imma go sit beside the toilet bowl.
helpppp ;_;

okay, till then.

our lohei's so nice! (:

the class. Y

look at melshan. HAHAHA

sijia, me, bestfriend's bestfriend melshan. (:

haha i'm tired!
NIGHTS (:

haha i think no one reads anymore.
cause no one tags anymore! ):

anyway,

Chantal Kreviazuk; Leaving On a Jetplane.


All my bags are packed, Im ready to go
Im standing here outside your door
I hate to wake you up to say goodbye
But the dawn is breakin, its early morn
The taxis waiting, hes blowin his horn
Already Im so lonesome I could cry.

So kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that youll wait for me
Hold me like youll never let me go.
Im leavin on a jet plane
I dont know when Ill be back again
Oh, babe, I hate to go.

Theres so many times Ive let you down
So many times Ive played around
I tell you now, they dont mean a thing
Every place I go, I think of you
Every song I sing, I sing for you
When I come back, Ill wear your wedding ring.

So kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that youll wait for me
Hold me like youll never let me go.
Im leavin on a jet plane
I dont know when Ill be back again
Oh, babe, I hate to go.

Now the time has come to leave you
One more time let me kiss you
Then close your eyes, Ill be on my way.
Dream about the days to come
When I wont have to leave alone
About the times, I wont have to say,

So kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that youll wait for me
Hold me like youll never let me go.
Im leavin on a jet plane
I dont know when Ill be back again
Oh, babe, I hate to go.

haahaha im currently into emo songs. :D

i really went for trng tdy and reached home just in time for dinner.
PHEW.

on a totally random note, i think im going nuts. D:

anyways, HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR PEOPLE!
festivals these days just come and go by like that.
like no atmosphere leh, like how i'm just sitting here blogging like some any other day.
hahas.

oh anyway we were playing daidee just now with super duper big cards that my brother got.
hahahaha its damn funny.
look!(smaller one's the normal sized one)

okay imma go off now!

emo period's over.
just a passing phase i guess, but its times like this that realities in life really get t me and i'd get t sit down and think through about stuffs.
i guess i've been wrong about certain stuffs all along.
but i guess im pretty clear-headed now.
hmmmmmm.
anyways, HELLO WORLD. (:
blog's unlocked for public viewing again HAHAS.

Hugh&Drew; Way Back Into Love.


I've been living with a shadow over head
I've been sleepin' with a cloud above my bed
I've been lonely for so long
Trapped in the past, I just cant seem to move on

I've been hiding all my hopes and dreams away
Just in case I ever need them again someday
Ive been setting aside time, to clear a little space in the corners of my mind

All I want to do is find a way back into love
I cant make it through without a way back into love
ohh

I've been watching but the stars refuse to shine
Ive been searching but I just don't see the signs
I know that its out there
Theres got to be something for my soul somewhere

I've been looking for someone to shed some light
Not just somebody to get me through the night
I could use some direction, and I'm open to your suggestions

All I want to do is find a way back into love
I cant make it through without a way back into love
and If I open my heart again
I guess I'm hopin' you'll be there for me in the end

There are moments when I don't know if its real
or if anybody feels the way I feel
I need inspiration, not just another negotiation

All I want to do is find a way back into love
I cant make it through without a way back into love
and If I open my heart to you
I'm hopin' you'll show me what to do
and if you help me to start again
you know that I'll be there for you in the end

song's been stuck in my head since saturday ahahas.

anyway, yup i've removed all my posts ever since i locked my blog ahahaha.
but im really glad for those who were there for me.
i feel so loved, really (:
BIG BIG THANKYOU! Y

haha CNY's in 2 days time and i havent got my new yr clothes. i think i'm a joke HAHA. -_-
and i need t pack my room for new yr or my mum will go crazy.
yess, i will pack LATERS.

optional trng's on tmr and im tempted t go D:
but i've also got 415 outing tmr OH I CANT DECIDE WHICH T GO FOR ):
hows.?

oh, GELARE with sum and jh tdy :D!
ate SUPER OILY CHICKEN RICE and ICE CREAM WAFFLE TODAY.
-feels guilty.- D:
nevermind its chinese new yr laaa. xD
resolution: EAT LESS BA GUAA!!

im blogging randomly AHAHAS.
econs tdy was probably the best period. with GAUMENT and WOLETILE and all that.
hahahaaha laughed myself crazy.

:D
walked past *COUGH*HAIR*COUGH* alot of times tdy.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
okay sorry. ><

i can't rmb what im supposed t blog about aleady D:
i think i have short-term memory ahahaha -_-
okay GOODNIGHTS ^^